There’s a person most of us carry. Someone who hurt us, who wronged us, who said or did something we haven’t fully put down. We don’t always think about them consciously — but they occupy space. Holding on to that weight costs something. Islam knows this.
Al-afuw — العَفْو — means pardon or forgiveness. And in Islamic teaching, forgiving others is not primarily about the person who wronged you. It’s about what the grudge is doing to you.
The Quranic invitation
Allah ﷻ says in Surah An-Nur (Quran 24:22): “Let them pardon and overlook. Would you not like that Allah ﷻ should forgive you? Allah ﷻ is Forgiving and Merciful.” The logic is direct: the forgiveness you hope to receive from Allah ﷻ is connected to the forgiveness you extend to others. Not as a transaction — as a reflection of character.
Al-Afuw is also one of Allah’s own names. He is the One who pardons — who doesn’t just forgive but obliterates the sin entirely. The dua of Laylat al-Qadr is: “Allahumma innaka ‘afuwwun tuhibbul ‘afwa fa’fu ‘anni” — O Allah, You are the Pardoner, You love to pardon, so pardon me. (Tirmidhi · 3513). We invoke this quality in Him while it’s also commanded of us toward others.
The Prophet ﷺ forgave when it was hardest
When the Prophet ﷺ entered Makkah after years of persecution, exile, and war — with the city at his feet and his former enemies before him — he declared a general amnesty. No reprisals. No punishment for those who had tortured his Companions, killed his family members, and mocked and stoned him from the city. “Go — you are free.”
That was not weakness. It was the most powerful act of character imaginable — forgiveness from a position of complete power, when nothing prevented him from doing otherwise. It changed hearts on the spot. Many of those he forgave became some of Islam’s most devoted followers.
What forgiveness is not
Islam doesn’t require you to pretend the wrong didn’t happen. It doesn’t require you to trust someone who proved themselves untrustworthy. It doesn’t demand you continue a relationship that causes harm. And it doesn’t require you to have warm feelings toward the person.
Forgiveness is the internal releasing of the claim — letting go of the desire for that person to suffer for what they did. It’s putting down the weight you’ve been carrying. The relationship can remain as it is. Your safety can remain protected. But the bitterness — which serves nothing — is the thing being released.
What the research confirms
Fred Luskin’s research at Stanford’s Forgiveness Project found that people who practised genuine forgiveness showed measurably lower levels of stress, anger, and physical symptoms — and higher levels of optimism and vitality. Forgiveness doesn’t benefit the person forgiven. It heals the person forgiving.
The Prophet ﷺ said: “Shall I not inform you of something better than the degree of voluntary fasting, prayer, and charity?” They said: “Yes.” He said: “Rectifying relations between people. And corrupting relations between people is the shaver.” (Abu Dawud · 4919). The cost of broken relationships and held grudges is described as greater than the missed reward of optional ibadah. That’s a remarkable statement about priorities.
Frequently Asked Questions
What does Islam say about forgiving others?
Islam strongly encourages forgiveness and connects it directly to the forgiveness one hopes to receive from Allah ﷻ (Quran 24:22). Al-Afuw (the Pardoner) is one of Allah’s names, and believers are called to embody it toward others. The Prophet ﷺ is one of the most remarkable examples of forgiveness in history — declaring a general amnesty for his enemies after entering Makkah.
Does forgiving someone mean trusting them again?
No. Forgiveness is an internal releasing of bitterness and the desire for the person to suffer — not a decision to restore the relationship to its previous state or to trust someone who demonstrated they were untrustworthy. Islam values both forgiveness and wisdom. You can genuinely forgive someone and maintain appropriate distance.
Is forgiveness always better than seeking justice?
Not always. Islam recognises the right to seek justice for wrongs done. Quran 42:40 says “the recompense of an evil act is an evil act equal to it” — justice is permitted. The Quran then adds: “but whoever pardons and makes reconciliation — his reward is with Allah.” Both options are valid. Forgiveness is described as superior, but justice is legitimate. The choice depends on context, severity, and what is best for all involved.
He entered Makkah with the power to take everything he was owed — and said: “Go. You are free.” That forgiveness changed history. Yours doesn’t need to change history. It just needs to free you.